What is the secret to a good relationship? Sex is vital to just about all happy and long-lasting relationships between men and women. It is not the most important aspect to many. Others mistakenly downplay the role of sex between couples, and attribute any and all emotional issues to other causes.
Here we won’t be talking about what are the best sexual positions, or how to please him or her with your fantastic oral sex techniques. These topics are deserving of their place – many people genuinely are ignorant when it comes to sexual performance and the right techniques to make your passionate feelings translate into orgasms.
A common saying when it comes to satisfying sex, and how to make sure you get it from a potential partner, is: “Try before you buy!”
Some people advocate waiting until marriage before embarking on a sexual relationship, however this is very risky. The man and woman may be totally incompatible sexually, and this could doom their future to failure.
For the following sex advice tips, we are going to apply them to long-standing relationships that had once been characterized by great sex, but somehow this has gone off the rails and become boring – if it hasn’t stopped altogether.
If one or both partners are suffering from a poor sex life, then without adequate communication channels, the problem will never be fixed. If you are miserable because your partner is either withholding sex from you, or rationing it out like a reward, you must let him or her know about your feelings immediately. The longer you leave it, the worse the problem will become.
Sometimes, the reasons may be quite mundane. For example, the woman may have a rash or discharge that she is embarrassed or even ashamed about, and would rather die that let her man know about it. Therefore, she keeps her knickers on at night and pretends to fall asleep. The same could apply to a man. Perhaps he has an erectile dysfunction that he is deeply troubled by, and the more he worries, the worse it gets.
Once a particular problem or problems are out in the open, it is surprising how simple they are to deal with.
If your partner is reluctant to speak about the problem, seek professional help from a qualified sex therapist.
If even this suggestion is greeted with silence, there may be some deeper underlying issues – perhaps even infidelity – and for this you may need the help of either a psychologist or other expert.
If you find out you are being cheated on, then decide if you want to salvage the relationship, or whether it may be better to abandon it altogether.
Once you have established what the problem is with your wife or husband, be aware that some sex problems take a while to sort out. If it is a physical or mental health problem, then it may take weeks, months or years.
When initiating sex with a partner who has been withholding, go gently and treat them with kid gloves at first. If your wife has been reluctant to even touch your penis for a while, don’t expect her to give you the blow job of your life just because she said she is willing to try to reactivate your sex life.
Give your woman or man space to breath. Don’t stifle them with demands. This is the key to getting the “respect” part sorted out.
Always treat your husband and wife with respect in bed. Make sure you give plenty of assurances that you understand whatever problem they have. Sometimes your partner may only want a kiss and a cuddle, and not mind blowing orgasms every night. He or she may be dead tired from working hard all week – you need to respect that.